The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Episode #263: Charlie McMahan - How To Build A Tribe From 50 To 5,000

Charlie McMahan has been the Lead Pastor of SouthBrook Church since 1992. He is driven by a deep concern for those who may feel like they don’t belong in a church and a sincere hope that anyone who struggles with faith can end up with a life that looks like the life of Jesus.  He is focused on developing future leaders and spends many hours a week mentoring others (including me!).

Charlie has led SouthBrook from a small church that originally met in an elementary school to now hosting more than 5,000 members per weekend.  He has a deep understanding for how to build a loyal tribe of people.

The Learning Leader Show

"The Process: Teaser, Tension, Truth, Take Home, Together."

Show Notes:

• Sustaining excellence:
  • Integrated people - They aren't chasing a bunch of different things
  • Consolidated on the self mission
  • Focused - Not distracted
• Family
  • Charlie's dad was gone 25 days a month (he later found out he was in the CIA)
  • The reason he turns down big opportunities is because he doesn't want to travel and wants to be with his family
  • Levels of communication with kids
    • Don't spend money on stuff, spend money on experiences -- Their place is Hilton Head
• Process for Charlie's performances (his speeches/sermons)
  • The word entertainment means "To hold people's attention"
• The Process:
  • Teaser - Something that grabs you
  • Tension - The inductive part of speaking that you have to do today. So the listeners know "this is important." If you don't do this, people will leave
  • Truth
  • Take Home - The practical "do"
  • Together - "Isn't this the kind of person we want to be?"
• Most preachers were trained to be deductive... You can't do that now. You need to help them draw their own conclusions.
• Finding a way to weave stories and science together
• The Medici Effect - The renaissance happened because seemingly disconnected entities were connected.
• "I'm always figuring out how disconnected entities connect"
• "The upside of stress"
  • "Emotions are like waves. You can't choose which ones come, but you can choose which to ride."
  • Choose to embrace stress, it can have a positive impact on you
• Create a habit of how you look at life:
  • How long did it take you to put this message together? "30 hours and a lifetime."
• The intersection of the reality of the struggles with Charlie's kids and applying it to the lives of the people you serve
• What is it like to be the children of someone as successful as Charlie?
  • "Our kids had so much pressure on them.  We didn't appreciate how much it was."
    • "The Famous Father Syndrome" - Kids choose to differentiate from their parents because they can't win that game
  • Advice give to parents:
    • "When you walk in the room, the temperature will go up for them.  Kids need stress to grow."
    • "The stress free life is the dying life"
    • "When we walked in the room, the temperature went way up for my kids. The same heat that drove me, burned them." --> "Most parenting things you learn 5 minutes too late"
    • PLAY - Personality type, Learning style, Ability level, Yes factor -- "You don't have to cave under the pressure. It doesn't have to destroy you"
• Growing a church from 50 people to 5,000 per weekend.  How?
  • Has to be a commitment to excellence that is YOU -- Has to be in ALL areas of your life. "Excellence is a habit."
    • "Excellence is expressing my worth... Ennobling others because I care. Perfectionism is trying to earn my worth by being perfect... And that is dangerous."  Be careful to not think, "I have to be perfect or I"m not worth anything."
    • "Maturity is way underrated"
    • "Excellence comes out of peace. In excellence the process is as much of importance as the product."
    • "I don't have grammatical errors on the manuscript that nobody else ever sees."
    • "Excellence is the right people doing the right things for the right reasons."
    • "The right motivations are not so compulsive."
    • "The constant burden of leadership is the constant interception of entropy."
      • "There is constant gravitational pull to become like everyone else."
    • "Our church is for someone who doesn't like church." Why? "Because I didn't like church."
    • How do you handle the immense value of YOU as the leader? And the success moving forward without you?
      • "We're constantly in process of finding the next leader."  "When you've been some place a long time, you become in the way."
        • Level 5 leader helps a place be better after they are gone
• How to build a tribe?
  • Max DuPree - What are your unique tribal speaks?
    • The 5 S's of SouthBrook:
      • Solitude, Scripture, Service, Support, Significant Events
  • "A Tribe is where story and strategy meet."
• What is it like the minute before you go on stage?
  • "I used to panic. It took me 10 years to get over the "what am I doing!?"
  • "Leading is so presumptuous."
  • "I've never stepped behind a microphone where I didn't believe that I could save people's lives. I truly believe every word I'm saying."
  • "I can't wait to share this."
  • "I didn't think about public speaking until I had to give a three minute speech my junior year in college.  Something happened at that speech. People leaned in."
  • "Hitting the 10,000 hour mark has helped me. It's easier to prepare.  I'm a huge believer in putting in the time."

• Charlie writes 3,500 words per week. Then put on the iPad and have it while on stage... "I memorize that by Friday."
• "I'm a master at self condemnation."
• Why be so critical of yourself?
  • "It can be a safety mechanism. If we self criticize, we won't get as much criticism. And it does connect with people."
• Developing future leaders
  • "The test of leadership is the ability to reproduce yourself in others... The good parts of yourself that should be reproduced."
  • "The path from direction to delegation"
  • "If I don't succeed in succession, then I will have failed."
  • "You can't be a farmer, you have to be a rancher who raises up other farmers."
• Ron Howard and Sam Jones -- Why Wall Street leaders hire former athletes?
  • "We like to hire athletes because they lose so much. They are forced to respond to failure."
• "I lose every day. I'm not good at having an accurate understanding of myself. I need people around me."
• "I was a world class (basketball) shooter. I shot 96% from the free throw line."
• Charlie was national player of the year.
• "Grit is the only talent.  Those tough moments are the character builders."
• Charlie's biggest challenge today? -- "Figuring out a way to build a succession plan and not leave too soon. I live in that tension everyday."
• "When I watch myself speak, I don't think it's very good."
• The importance of hobbies
• How does it take a toll on your when you can't please everybody?
  • "Leadership is the art of disappointing people at a rate they can handle.  You cannot sustain trying to please everyone. "
• The importance of continued growth and having an apprentice
  • PB&J
    • Have to have people ahead of you, stretch you, challenge you
    • Need people alongside you, your peers, in it together, consolidate over shared stories
    • We grow most when we have people to teach. To pour in to...
• "Writing makes a person exact. If it's hazy in the podium, it will be foggy in the chair."
• "If you can't listen, you can't lead."
• "There is no other leader than The Learning Leader."
• Use the "Get To Know You Document"

"If you don't keep growing, you will become irrelevant."

Social Media:

• Follow Charlie on Twitter: @CharlieBMcMahan
• Connect with me on LinkedIn
• Join our Facebook Group: The Learning Leader Community
• To Follow Me on Twitter: @RyanHawk12

More Learning:

Episode 078: Kat Cole – From Hooters Waitress To President of Cinnabon

Episode 216: Jim Collins -- How To Go From Good To Great

Episode 179: How To Sustain Excellence - The Best Answers From 178 Questions

Episode 234: Jocko Willink -- Why Discipline Equals Freedom

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

#262: Keith Yamashita - The Keys To Great Execution (Oprah, Starbucks, Steve Jobs)

Keith Yamashita  has led SYPartners for the past two decades, a practice that collaborates with CEOs and their leadership teams to build great companies and organizations. He’s worked with leaders at Apple, eBay, IBM, General Electric, Johnson & Johnson, Facebook, Nike, Starbucks, and Target Corporation, among others. SYPartners has been recognized by The Wall Street Journal, Fast Company, and Fortune for its unique, human-centered approach, applied to both business and social challenges. Earlier in Keith's career, he was the chief writer for Steve Jobs. 

The Learning Leader Show

Action Step - "Build a daily contemplative practice to create mind-fitness."

Show Notes:

• Sustaining excellence:
  • The ability to envision a future that doesn't currently exist -- Make it a reality
  • Optimistic
  • Creative
  • A diverse background
  • Authentic communicator
  • Daring and bold
• People Keith has worked with who have sustained excellence:
  • Oprah Winfrey - magnetic personality, she can envision the future we want. She constantly re imagines herself. She has a strong creative core. She has a sense of deep creativity.
  • Howard Schultz - He's always restless, reinvents regularly. He's earned 9,000% return on investors money
• How do you respond when Oprah calls you for help?
  • "We are always on the outer edge of incompetence.  We take on projects that we don't know the answer to.  And then figure it out.  We respond to those calls with deep humility."
• Why choose Keith and SYPartners?
  • "If a leader wants to try something new... We help them experiment."
• Starbucks:
  • Closed 8,000 stores for racial bias training.
  • Keith and team helped them build new habits
• SYPartners origin story:
  • "Our goal has never been to be famous, our goal is to be impactful"
  • 25 years ago with "three partners and $912 in my checking account"
  • Started as a communications firm --> Strategy --> Innovation --> Culture --> Transformation
  • There are 200 employees now
  • "We fight for greatness. We help leaders choose a more daring path"
  • "Everything is set with intentions" --> "Set your intentions and be very open to the universe"
• How do you respond to skeptics?
  • "When I started I had $912 in my checking account.  I had to borrow money for rent."
  • Only you know what's inside of you.  "Your skepticism needs to be inward, not outward."
  • "If greatness is your choice, it's not made in big leaps, it's made in daily focus."
    • "Micro actions add up"
• How to make the leap from individual contributor to manager?
  • Leadfully.com has been helpful
• What was it like working for Steve Jobs?
  • "I showed up with writing samples. He said they were awful. He was testing me to see if I believed in my work.  It was the worst interview of my life... However, I got the job."
  • "He's the toughest boss I ever had.  But I learned more from him than anyone I've worked for."
  • Steve was gifted in seeing what people were capable of and he was willing to push. He knew how to motivate you to your capacity
  • The danger in mimicking Steve's behavior? "People try to mimic the behavior, but they don't have his intentions." Mimicking the behavior without the intentions is a recipe for disaster.
• Execution and implementation:
  • Mind-fitness - Creativity in moments that matter. Be connected to others in a calm way. Ideas are just ideas. "You can train your mind to be present in this moment."  Don't judge others. "Build a daily contemplative process."
  • Build a daily creative practice - Read, write, take notes, be awake, alive, aware. Get a folder, cut out articles, pictures. Create inspiration.  Recall past events.
  • Understand what moment you're in - What's happening? Develop keen awareness to the moments
• Why books are the greatest investment ever (my thoughts)
• Use the "Get To Know You Document"

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

#261: Darryl Strawberry - MLB Superstar: World Series, Home Runs, & Substance Abuse

Darryl Strawberry helped lead the New York Mets to a World Series championship and the New York Yankees to three World Series championships.  He was also suspended three times by Major League Baseball for substance abuse.  He was a nine time all star and he hit 335 home runs during his illustrious career.

He is an ordained minister, speaker, and author.  He is taking his message to the masses with his new book, Don't Give Up On Me -- Shedding Light on Addiction.

The Learning Leader Show

"My Dad beat the crap out of me.  He told me I would never amount to anything. I believed him." -- Darryl Strawberry

Show Notes:

• Sustaining excellence:
  • A calming presence... Confidence in what you know
  • Time spent learning to lead
  • Davey Johnson and Joe Torre -- A measured, confident approach to understanding each individual and how they needed to be managed
• Best teammates?
  • Gary Carter
  • Keith Hernandez
  • Lead by example type people... Those who are consistently doing the work every single day
  • They understand how to prepare and do not get distracted from the work
• Darryl struggled to be consistent because of his wondering focus
• How to bounce out of a slump?
  • "When you're 2 for 30, how do you get yourself out of a jam?  Go to the batting cage and do the work."
• What was the key to winning the World Series in 1986?
  • "A complete team effort.  We were a WHOLE team. Complete.  Every guy did their part."
• Why did Darryl use drugs?
  • "An emptiness. I've never been well on the inside.  Pain led me to greatness, but was also the cause for drug use."
  • "My dad beat the crap out of me. He told me I would never be anything and I believed him."
• Why are so many world class athletes insecure?
  • "They are yearning for love and do not always get it. I never had a good Dad.  I had to learn lessons on my own.  Nobody taught me."
• Advice to young people who do not have a Dad?
  • "Listen to your mom.  I wish I would have.  Take her direction.  Allow mentors to help you.  Allow people to power into your life.  It was hard for me to trust people."
• Being a dad to successful athletes -- (His sons are professional basketball players and his daughters are scholarship volleyball players)
  • "I did not coach them, but I encourage them continually work to get better. I didn't push them to play baseball."
• The Doc and Darryl 30 For 30
  • "I love Doc.  We are still good friends.  We've been through a lot."
• Why write Don't Give Up On Me?
  • "There are so many problems in the world.  Addiction is everywhere.  I want to help people.  I was great, but broken at the same time."
• A defining moment?
  • His wife said, "If you're ever going to get well, you have to take that uniform off."  Had to stop identifying as a baseball player
• "You must take responsibility for your actions"
• "You need people in your inner circle who will be honest with you and tell you no."
• Day to day work: Pastor, travel, bring hope to those who are struggling"
• Would you ever work in baseball again?
  • "No... Unless Derek Jeter called and asked me to help his team."
• Toughest pitcher ever faced?
  • Nolan Ryan
• Why were you a great hitter?
  • Preparation... On deck circle.  Always getting ready
  • "Focus on hitting line drives to the opposite field.  That's how you know you're on it" -- Keith Hernandez was very helpful
• "It's about people.  I should have been dead, had cancer twice, chased women, drug issues.  I have urgency everyday."

• Use the "Get To Know You Document"

"It's about people. I should have been dead.  I had cancer twice, chased women, had drug issues.  I have urgency everyday."

Social Media:

• Read: Don't Give Up On Me
• Connect with me on LinkedIn
• Join our Facebook Group: The Learning Leader Community
• To Follow Me on Twitter: @RyanHawk12

More Learning:

Episode 078: Kat Cole – From Hooters Waitress To President of Cinnabon

Episode 216: Jim Collins -- How To Go From Good To Great

Episode 179: How To Sustain Excellence - The Best Answers From 178 Questions

Episode 234: Jocko Willink -- Why Discipline Equals Freedom

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Episode #260: Mark Divine - How To Create An Unbeatable Mind

At twenty-six Mark Divine graduated as Honor Man (#1-ranked trainee) of SEAL BUD/S class number 170. Mark served for nine years total on active duty and eleven as a Reserve SEAL, retiring as Commander in 2011.  His leadership of teams was so effective the government tasked him with creating a nationwide mentoring program for SEAL trainees.  He earned his MBA at NYU.  In 2007 he launched the SEALFIT program to provide transformational personal and team training experiences. The training utilizes an integrated warrior development model he developed, called Unbeatable Mind, which draws from his 20 years as a SEAL and business leader, 25 years as a martial artist and 15 years as yoga practitioner.  Mark has written has written four books, including The Way of The SEAL, and Unbeatable Mind.

The Learning Leader Show

"Do today what others aren't willing to do.  You're 20X more capable than what you think."

Show Notes:

• Sustaining excellence:
  • People who have practices that value excellence and practice it regularly
  • Optimized training, sleep, and balance
  • Mental health:
    • Meditation, nature, learning, reducing potential to be stuck in biases
  • Emotional health:
    • Not afraid of going to therapy, spritual
• Why is therapy helpful?
  • Mark married a therapist
  • They can be an emotional coach
  • "It's preventative maintenance" --> Must be proactive
  • A "check up from the neck up"
• You should always be investing in improving your "self"
  • Be mindful - yoga, zen.  It's an evolutionary skill to help you connect at a deeper level
• Why become a Navy SEAL?
  • Got MBA and a CPA -- Got a job on Wall Street and hated it after three months
  • Started Zen meditation... It changed his brain
  • It created a structured program to look within himself and reflect
  • Mark did not like what was happening in the outer world (with his job)
  • He was meant to be a warrior and a leader
• Did he ever have doubts?
  • No... Because he had prepared for the difficult moments through visualization and fully understanding his WHY
  • "I created total certainty in my mind. 100% that I was going to become a SEAL. I won in my mind."
  • This outlook helped him finish #1 overall in his BUD/S class
• How can we apply this to our world?  Outside of the military?
  • You must deeply care about what you're doing... And then visualize your success.
  • A "personal practice of excellence"
  • "It must be something in your vision that you are really passionate about"
  • "Visualize it as a completion.  Visualize doing it to completion."
  • "You're the type of person who is worthy of completing that challenging task... Of achieving THAT"
• How do you respond to skeptics?
  • The science backs it up... Do your research
  • Give it a try... Why wouldn't you?
• VUCA = Volatility, Uncertainty, Complex, Ambiguous -- How to handle these situations
• Creating a decentralized organization -- Why this works in the military and in business (trust and certainty)
• Why you must "learn to embrace risk" -- Cannot be afraid of failure... And the plan must be flexible
• "Do today what others won't" -- 20X more capable than what you think
• "Society has weakened us... Everything is easy now.  You need to force yourself to do hard things."
• "Challenge leads to growth."
• "Your body will adapt to the new reality."  "Push it past where you think it can currently go"
• "You must challenge yourself every single day"
• Exercise - Write your own obituary.  Think "What would people say about me?"
  • Do the deep self awareness work to "know thyself"
  • "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for everything"
• "Derive your passion around purpose. Create your set of principles."
• Originally, there was a scathing obituary written for Alfred Nobel... It was meant for his twin brother, but there was a mistake and someone wrote it about him.  It changed his life.  He was not aware of how badly he was thought of... And he became known for peace moving forward.  So much so... That they named a prize after him.
• How Brad Stevens and Bill Belichick have mastered the art of coaching
• Why the "hacking movement" is not good according to Mark
• There must be deep learning over many years to get to mastery level of anything
• Simplify = Be narrow on what you want, get rid of everything else. And focus
• Use the "Get To Know You Document"

Social Media:

• Read: Unbeatable Mind
• Follow Mark on Twitter: @MarkDivine
• Connect with me on LinkedIn
• Join our Facebook Group: The Learning Leader Community
• To Follow Me on Twitter: @RyanHawk12