The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Text LEARNERS to 44222

@RyanHawk12

Full notes at www.LearningLeader.com

Episode #376: David Perell - Why You Should Write

Notes:

• The importance of writing -- Why everyone should write… “Having a website with articles you've published is like having a personal agent who finds career opportunities for you 24/7."
• “Writing crystallizes ideas in ways thinking on its own will never accomplish.” — Morgan Housel
• "The person who writes sets the strategy. If you want to lead, write."
• "Writing is a 'proof of work' mechanism"
  • It shows the world that you've thought deeply about a topic
• Networking - The old way vs the new way
  • Old -- Go to conferences, happy hours, networking events
  • New -- Publish your work online. You attract the type of people you want...
• Bill James analytical approach. His book only sold 550 copies, but one of them was to Billy Beane (General Manager of the Oakland A's). And the "Moneyball" revolution was created...
• The Venn Diagram of Specificity
  • Learn how to create this for your business
• How to built a career? Do things that are unique, in demand, but the world doesn't have yet
• Your first draft is what is top of mind -- "Rewriting is rethinking." It's the process to make our ideas better. Writing and re-writing will make you a more thoughtful person and will create clarity.
• Writing is an element of teaching.
  • Expertise is like a ladder -- Be like an investigative reporter about a topic that fascinates you
• The benefits of learning in public: "It is the best way to build a network." It's a forcing function. It forces your brain to always be on.
• "Want a great spouse? Deserve one." - Charlie Munger
• Publishing your work online (podcast, essays, book) is the greatest networking tool in the world. I’ve met amazing people because they’ve benefitted from my work (head coach Atlanta Falcons, Brooklyn Nets, Ohio State basketball coach, SVP of Fortune 50 companies).
• Community and connection —- community becomes the byproduct when you’re going through something challenging together (ie: Navy SEALs).
  • “The strength of a community is hard to quantify, which makes it hard to advertise. But like good music, you measure it by how it moves your spirits and how you feel in its presence.”
• Competition is for Losers: Avoid competition. Stop copying what everybody else is doing. If you work at a for-profit company, work on problems that would not otherwise be solved. If you’re at a non-profit, fix unpopular problems. Life is easier when you don’t compete. (Hint: don’t start another bottled water company).
• Personal Monopoly: Corporations reward conformity, but the Internet rewards people who are unique. If you work in a creative field, strive to be the only person who does what you do. Find your own style, then run with it. Create intellectual real estate for yourself. (Jerry Garcia -- Be the only person who does what you do)
• The Map Is Not the Territory: Reality will never match the elegance of theory. All models have inconsistencies, but some are still useful. Some maps are useful because they’re inaccurate. If you want to find an edge, look for what the map leaves out.
• There are two kinds of companies:
  • 1) Product-First Audiences: Build a product, then an audience. Attract customers with paid advertisements.
  • 2) Audience-First Products: Build an audience, then a product. Attract customers with differentiated content.
• Take Action -- "Taking action will teach you more about yourself in a month than years of contemplation ever will."
• Making something easier expands the market... But making it harder gets you the clients you really want.
• Twitter is the town-square of the internet. It can be the best learning tool in the world if you use it right:
  • Mute politics
  • Unfollow people who make you angry
  • Understand your opponent's opinion better than they do
  • Production: Make tweets useful. It forces you to focus on ideas that are timeless. It forces you to have constant epiphanies.
  • Have "spiky" ideas -- They pierce society.
  • Have a point of view
• Sustained excellence =
  • Obsession - Doing great work is hard. You need to love it. "I can't live without creating."
  • Vision - Set a goal that scares you and march toward it. Have ambition
  • A keen understanding of what one is good at - Self-awareness.

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Text LEARNERS to 44222 for more details

Full show notes at www.LearningLeader.com

Episode #375: Miranda Hawk - How To Cultivate A Loving Relationship. Miranda Hawk is an award winning sales professional, builder of teams, and sits on the board for multiple non-profit organization. Miranda is my wife, and together we are striving to raise our daughters to be kind, strong, hard-working, resilient leaders. Miranda is the former owner of the Dayton Mom Collective, a business that provides a positive voice for motherhood by connecting moms to resources and parenting perspectives unique to their communities. She has worked in the profession of selling since she was 14 and understands the determination and work ethic it takes to sustain excellence. **We recorded this conversation on our Anniversary.**

Notes:

• The symbolism of a wedding anniversary - The amount of time is not impressive. It's what you do during that time. The type of people you become. Not just that you've made it a certain number of years, but making those years count. The relationship has grown. The love for one another has grown. You’ve accomplished things together and on your own. And both people in the relationship and the world around are better because of the relationship.
• What was the initial attraction and how that has grown and/or changed over time? (Confidence (shoulders back), beauty, work ethic, your demonstration of excellence at your craft, toughness) --> the blending of a family. Challenges and the joy of it....
  • What is beauty? Is beauty a pretty face, a nice smile, flowing hair, nice skin? Not to me, it's not. To me beauty is living life to higher standards, stronger morals and ethics and believing in them, whether people tell you you're right or wrong. Beauty is not wasting a day. Beauty is noticing life's little intricacies and taking time out of your busy day to really enjoy those little intricacies. Beauty is being real, being genuine, being pure with no facade—what you see is what you get. Beauty is expanding your mind, always seeking knowledge, not being content, always going after something and challenging yourself." -- Jake Plummer (describing Pat Tillman)
• The pursuit - the importance of being in pursuit of one another -- Love is a verb. It's a constant action. It's a behavior towards one another.
  • Why "happy wife, happy life" is stupid -- In what other world is the focus on only making one person in the relationship happy? You wouldn't do that in a friendship. You wouldn't do that at work. Why would you do that in your marriage?
• Gratitude -- Saying the words. The power behind words. Being intentional about saying thank you. The importance of specificity.
• Learning Leader Circle question (Chris G) I'm always fascinated by how things start. As you have started the podcast, what did that look like for your family in starting the venture? Also the dynamic that you have as far as how much you are involved with each other’s careers? i.e. involved and talk about it daily, or primarily keep your conversations centered on the family and personal life.
• The importance of leading yourself first... It gives you the energy and drive to love others.
• Conflict resolution - It's critical to have open dialog about the mistakes made and how we rectify them... We strive to have a relationship where we can discuss disagreements, come to a resolution, and move forward.
• Health and wellness -- Why taking care of ourselves is so important. You're passionate about this and have made our family better because of it. "If you take care of your body, it will take care of you." 
  • "I'm striving to be the best version of myself."
• I'm attracted to discipline... And the ability to do what's hard
• Our WHO -- Becoming more intentional about dinner dates/friends/how we spend our time
• Advice for younger women -
  • Be proactive - Your job responsibilities are the minimum, do more than that
  • Develop a strong work ethic
  • Be positive -- Bring positive energy
• Learning Leader Circle question from Nick -- What are your key family anchors” for the week or month?  Example:  Sunday dinners, etc.- We invested in a nice area to gather outside on our back porch. Our family dinners together are what we love most... The exercise we do: Each person says something they love about every other person at the table. Get specific!
  
• “Your mate will either inspire you to grow into your greatness or they will confine you to complacency. They’ll either be your other half, or they’ll make you half of yourself.” - Nuri Muhammad
• “Business like life is all about how you make people feel. It’s that simple and it’s that hard.  —— Consciously think about how I make you feel.” - Danny Meyer
• “Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation.” - Oscar Wilde
• Habits/Routines -- Differences and similarities
• The importance of long walks together...

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Text LEARNERS to 44222 for more details

Full show notes at www.LearningLeader.com

Episode #374: Alexandra Carter - How To Ask For More. Alexandra Carter is a Clinical Professor of Law and Director of the Mediation Clinic at Columbia Law School. She has spent the last eleven years helping thousands of people negotiate better, build relationships and reach their goals. In 2019, Alex was awarded the Columbia University Presidential Award for Outstanding Teaching, Columbia University’s highest teaching honor. She is a world-renowned negotiation trainer for groups and individuals from all over the world

Notes:

• Excellent leaders have a beginner's mindset
• What does a mediator do?
  • They are a third person that helps people negotiate. The good ones don't act like the smartest person in the room. They are learners and great listeners.
• What is negotiation?
  • It is NOT a transaction over money.
  • Negotiation is any conversation where you are steering a relationship Every conversation is like being in a kayak. Approach every conversation differently... With intention.
• “We make our world significant by the courage of our questions and by the depth of our answers.” - Carl Sagan
• The ultimate open ended question -- “Tell Me…” Questions - an open question is like fishing with a net. A closed question is fishing with a pole. A great open question doesn’t have a question mark.  “Tell me about your trip to India!”
• Change your WHY questions to WHAT questions...Rather than ask “Why haven’t I been able to… Turn that around to “What has made this challenging for me?” Move from a place of blame to curiosity.
• How to handle a PDP (performance development plan) meeting? How to ask for a raise?
  • Recruit your manager to be on your side. Share your goals with them, bring them along with you... Connect with your manager. Talk about the future and how you can work together. Ask open ended questions to learn more about the needs of the business. Tie your money request to your production.
  • Use "I + We" statements - Share how your work benefits the company.
• Your asks should be:
  • Optimistic
  • Specific
  • Justifiable
• Research suggests that women hold themselves to perfectionist standards
• As a boss: Invest in top performers, mentor people, empower them, unleash them
• What do you need? 2 buckets
  • Tangibles - touch, see, count
  • Intangibles - Values, freedom, acknowledgement
• Questions to ask yourself:
  • What would progress look like?
  • What do I feel? Grapple with your feelings so that they don't control you
  • How have I handled this successfully in the past? Ask yourself about prior success. Write down your answer. It's a "power prime."
• Questions to ask:
  • The first 5 questions are for your side- The Mirror: What's the problem I want to solve? What do I need?, What do I feel?, How have I handled this successfully in the past?, What's the first step?
  • Then, the second 5 questions are for your opposite number: The Window: Tell me?, What do you need?, What are your concerns?, How have you handled this successfully in the past? What's the first step?
• The five, best open-ended questions to ask in each part seek to identify and define the following: (1) the problem/goal; (2) needs; (3) feelings/concerns; (4) previous success; and (5) the first step. And that the answers to these important questions can help steer conversations, relationships, and negotiations that will increase the likelihood of a desired negotiation destination.
• “The Mirror,” in that knowing oneself by spending the time it takes to honestly ponder, reflect, and journal one’s personal thoughts, feelings, expectations, and dreams to answer those five questions, in an attempt to not only improve one’s skills in formal negotiations, but to also navigate the relationships in life’s journey.

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Text LEARNERS to 44222

Full show notes can be found at www.LearningLeader.com

#373: Bill Perkins is a hedge fund manager, film producer, and high stakes poker player. He is the author of Die with Zero: Getting All You Can from Your Money and Your Life. 

Notes:

• Your life is the sum of your experiences… “The business of life is the acquisition of memories. In the end, that’s all there is.” - The butler from Downtown Abbey...
• Excellence:
  • Integrity with your word and yourself -- Don't lie to yourself and others. You can't be flippant with yourself.
    • Don't say it unless you mean it (to yourself and others)
• How to maximize your lifetime memorable moments with “memory dividends”
• How to get the most experiences in the optimal time with “experience bucketing”
  • In each season, experiences will forever go away. Map out the experiences you want and what you are saving for. There are some experiences that you can only do when you're young and healthy. There is a deterioration of health. You won't always be able to climb a mountain or wake board. Do those now.
• Follow your "net worth curve" - "Consume money and convert it into experiences."
• How to navigate whether to invest in or delay a meaningful adventure based on your “personal interest rate” -- "Should I take one trip today or two trips in 10 years?"
• Bill shares the life changing conversation he had with his boss, Joe Farrell, a partner at the company where he worked --  Bill was making $18,000/year and had saved $1,000. Joe questioned him... "Go spend that money! Why deprive yourself? You don't think you're going to make more money as you get older?!"
• Jason Ruffo -- Backpacked Europe when he was young and able even though he didn't have any more. He did it while he could instead of waiting to have enough money. He now has an experience dividend for life that Bill doesn't.
• What are we saving for?
  • Survival
  • Experiences we want - The memory dividend - "This is the stuff of life." It's a compounding dividend
    • "Who am I? The summation of my experiences."
    • "Money is a tool to have the experience."
• Die With Zero is about choices - What do you choose to do now? What later?
• Bill and I have the same literary agent, Jim Levine - Bil liked Jim because he told him that his proposal wasn’t good enough to share with publishers when it was first written... Bill appreciated that honest feedback and desire to make it better.
• "It’s hypocritical and stupid to leave inheritance to your kids." (Give them money when they're young and can use it for cool experiences).
• Behaviors for hiring:
  • Integrity
  • Intrinsic motivation
  • Problem solvers
• "Aiming to die with zero is the most thoughtful thing you can do."